Ready or Not
by HeidiBug731
Summary: The engagement, the pregnancy, and the birth. A story of Remus and Tonks's experiences as they go from a dating couple to a family. Written post HBP.
1. The Engagement

I hadn't seen anyone writing anything like this, so I thought I'd give it a shot.

* * *

_The Engagement_

"What do you think?"

"It's nice."

"Do you think she'll like it?"

"Personally, I think she'll be so overjoyed that you're proposing to her that she won't even notice the ring. You have _no_ idea what I've had to put up with at the office."

"Kingsley, be serious."

"What do you want me to say, Remus? It's a diamond. I'm not a broad. How am I supposed to know how she'll react?"

Remus sighed. "Sorry. I'm just nervous."

"You look like you're about to jump out of your skin," he said honestly. "Calm down, Remus. What do you have to be nervous about, anyway? It's not like she's going to say 'no.'"

"It's a big step," he admitted. "I'm not sure we're ready for this."

"I think Tonks has been ready for at least a year."

"Well, then I'm not sure _I'm_ ready," he corrected.

Kingsley was thoughtful for a moment. "Where did you get it?"

"It was my mother's." Remus told him shortly.

"And how many people have you shown it to?"

"Everyone but her," he admitted.

"Well, no pressure or anything, but if you decide you're 'not ready,' then there's a whole room full of people in there who are going to be very disappointed."

Remus nodded. _No pressure_.

The war was over. There had been so many funerals, so much death and tears that some had decided to get together in a celebration of life and peace. It just seemed like the right time to do it, Remus thought as he studied the ring. But ready or not, it was still a mighty big step to take.

He moved to put the ring back in the box. "Oh, shit!"

"What?" asked Kingsley, alarmed. He'd never heard Remus curse aloud before.

"I _dropped_ it!" he exclaimed, lowering himself to the floor. "Shit," he cursed softly. "Help me find it!"

"I didn't hear it fall." Nevertheless, Kingsley got down on his hands and knees and felt around. "It's got to be around here somewhere. It can't have gone too far."

Remus cursed again, panicking. If he'd lost that ring . . . "Where did it go?"

"What are you looking for?"

Both men looked up at the sound of Tonks's voice, horrified.

"We are, um, we're-" Remus stammered, trying to think of a good cover up.

Kingsley brought his hand up to tug nervously on his ear. _His earring!_ He quickly unclasped the small hoop from his lobe. "My ring - earring," he corrected quickly. "I lost my earring."

Remus nodded vigorously. _Nice one._

"Oh," she said, glancing at the auror's now bare ear. "Well, here, I'll help you look for it."

"NO!" both men shouted at once.

Tonks looked taken aback.

"We've got it." Kingsley assured her.

"But, er, thank you," added Remus.

Tonks looked at them strangely but eventually walked away.

Remus let out a shaking breath. "That was too close." He continued his search, scanning the floor franticly with his eyes and his hands. "It's not here."

Kingsley put his earring back in and looked under the table. "Don't say that. It's _has_ to be here."

Remus felt around on his person. "It's in my pocket," he said in amazement.

"What!" Kingsley tried to get to his feet so fast that he hit his head on the table's underside with a force that made him feel as though his skull had just cracked in two. He cursed loudly through gritted teeth, pressing a hand to the top of his head. "What do you mean it's in your god damn pocket?" Kingsley was ticked. He'd just cracked his head on the table for no reason. It really hurt.

Remus sighed in relief as he held up the newly located ring. "It must have fallen in my pocket when I dropped it." He looked at Kingsley as though noticing him for the first time. "Are you okay-?"

"You better not chicken out, Remus." Kingsley threatened. "Or I swear to God, I'll kill you." He walked away, rubbing his head aggravatedly.

* * *

Remus had never been so nervous in his entire life . . . the looks Kingsley was shooting him every time he got the chance were not helping. Everyone that he knew or cared about was sitting at the long tables that had been set up for dinner. They all appeared to be wrapped up in conversation, but he knew they were all waiting for him since he'd told them all that he was going to "pop the question."

Well, no, not everyone. Harry, Ron, Hermione, and Ginny were all sitting a little farther down on the opposite side from him. He hadn't said anything to them, and he realized that he probably should have. They weren't kids anymore, after all. Though, it was hard to not think of them that way. He silently wondered what their reactions would be.

"Are you okay?" asked Tonks suddenly.

Remus nearly jumped from nerves, but he caught himself just in time. "I'm fine."

"You've been acting really strange lately," she told him. "And you haven't eaten." She indicated the plate of food that he had barely touched.

"I'm not hungry," he told her. He didn't think he could hold anything down with the way his stomach was squirming.

She studied him intently. "I've heard that one before," she informed him.

He placed a hand on hers and looked her in the eye. "I'm fine. Really. It's nothing to worry about."

She continued to study him, and he knew she was searching for something to indicate that he was lying to her. She looked like she was about to say something to him, but Molly tapped her on the arm and pulled her into conversation. She shot Remus a meaningful look over Tonks's shoulder.

Remus sighed. The plates were emptying andhe knew that if he was going to do this in front of everyone, like he wanted to, then now would be the time to do it before people started leaving the table. It was a big step and he wanted to take it, but that didn't mean that some part of him wasn't terrified.

He picked up his fork and tapped it against his glass to get everyone's attention, but his hands were shaking so badly that it didn't come out right. It didn't really matter, though. Everyone had been so alert while waiting for him to do something that the table went quiet almost instantly, everyone's attention turning to him.

Remus stood up, careful to push his chair back. He could feel Tonks's quizzical glance on him, but he didn't turn to her, not yet.

"I'd like to . . . say a few words," he said, looking at each and every one of them in turn but avoiding their eyes. "But . . . I'd probably muck it all up so . . ."

He dropped to one knee before Tonks. He swore he heard a gasp coming from Hermione's direction, or maybe it had been Ginny, maybe both of them at once. He took Tonks's hand, her face lighting up in sudden comprehension.

"Oh, god," she breathed, hardly daring to believe it.

He smiled up at her, establishing eye contact and resolving not to break it. He needed her with him so that they could get through this together. Reaching into his pocket, he pulled out the small box and flipped it open with his thumb.

"Oh, god," she repeated, her eyes filling up with moisture. She couldn't believe this was really happening. She had waited for so long. She had thought that maybe he wouldn't . . . A single tear rolled down her cheek.

"Nymphadora," he said, the words coming far easier than he had thought they would. "Will you marry me?"

She blinked, a smile spreading across her face as tears cascaded down her beautiful face. "Of course, I'll marry you, Remus," she said finally. He immediately felt the butterflies in his stomach dissipate. "Yes," she amended. "I will."

There was clapping and cheering as he slipped the ring on her finger, grinning in a way he hadn't believed he could. He'd forgotten he could smile that broadly. Hermione would later comment to Harry and Ron that she'd never seen him so happy.

Remus stood and pulled Tonks to her feet. He pulled her to him and kissed her passionately, to which there was even more cheering and whistles broke out. The happy couple didn't hear any of it, however. They were both lost in a massive flood of emotion. Remus hadn't known it was possible to feel so much joy.

Their lips parted, and he held her tightly while she sobbed joyously into his shoulder. At length, he gently pulled her away from him and brought his hand to her face, wiping away her tears.

"I love you," he told her.

"I love you too." She kissed him softly.

Once the excitement died down, Molly pulled Tonks away to congratulate her and to see how the ring looked on her finger. Hermione and Ginny were chatting delightedly, shushing the boys whenever they tried to cut in. Once the foursome realized that Remus was watching them, they looked up at him. It was evident on all their faces that they were very happy for him.

Remus laughed, the smile that seemed to be plastered on his face growing even wider. Arthur came over and clapped Remus on the shoulder. After a brief conversation, Remus turned to glance at Kingsley, who flashed him the thumbs up sign, apparently content that he wouldn't have to kill Remus after all.


	2. The Pregnancy

Update! yay! lol.

I had originally planned this to be two chapters, but I've decided to add one more after this. So, now it will be three chapters!

Enjoy!_

* * *

_

_The Pregnancy_

Tonks took the first test that morning. She had been felling _off_ lately. On top of that, she'd missed her period. She'd been known to miss it before, so that wasn't what had caught her attention. No, what really got her wondering was the way she had been feeling lately. It wasn't anything major, not big changes. She often felt _off_ around the time her period came, but what struck her as strange this time was that it was a different feeling of being _off_ (she didn't know how else to explain it to herself).

It was kind of like feeling hurt: There were two very different ways to feel it. One way was emotional hurt, and the other way was physical hurt. She realized that there was more than one way of feeling _off_, and the way she was feeling right now was a way that she had never felt before. She got to wondering, _Could I be?_

So, she took a test. Then, knowing how inaccurate they could be, she went to the store and bought three different brands (it was funny how muggle devices were the only way to test for this kind of thing). She took the second one that very same morning. Then she obliterated all evidence in case Remus happened to notice her disregarded tests in the trash and asked her about them. She wasn't taking any chances. She had to be sure.

She waited a day and took the third around noon. By then, she realized that if all three tests concurred, there really couldn't be any room for doubt. However, she waited one more day and took the fourth and final test in the afternoon.

This test worked differently than the others, in fact they all had worked differently (why did they do that?). Like the others, she read through the directions carefully and kept a watch close by to make sure she got the timing right. She watched the seconds tick by, refusing to look at the test until the precise moment. Then she took a deep breath and searched for the symbol she knew would be there. There really was no use in procrastinating any longer.

"Oh, god," she muttered softly. The reality of the situation hit harder than she had thought it would, and she leaned against the counter for support.

They hadn't planned this. It just went to show that although there were plenty of magical protections available, they weren't always fool proof . . . especially when you forgot to use them one time (which is what she assumed had happened). She and Remus had _talked_ about having children, of course, but . . . They'd only been married a few years. Were they ready for something like this? _Was_ there such a thing as being ready for having your first child?

_Probably not_, she reflected. After all, having a baby was a huge step.

But the question of whether or not they were ready wasn't what was bothering her. What was bothering her was that she wasn't sure what Remus's reaction would be. He'd told her once that he "didn't know" if he'd make a good father. She wasn't sure why he would think that, but she'd learned during the years she'd been with him that he had an insecure side.

What if he didn't think the timing was right for them to have a child? What if he wanted her to "get rid of it?" Would he leave her when she told him "no?" She knew she'd never be able to bring herself to get an abortion, and if he wanted her to and she didn't . . .

_Slow down, Tonks,_ she thought. _You're getting ahead of yourself._ There wasn't any reason to think that everything wouldn't turn out just fine. Still . . . she'd never felt so nervous in her life.

* * *

Her hands were shaking so badly that she dropped the test on the hardwood floor as she was carrying it out to him. She scrambled to pick it back up, but she knew Remus had heard her. He came out into the hallway, probably thinking she'd tripped (as she was prone to doing).

"Are you all right?" She hadn't fallen (as he had originally thought), but she looked pale. She seemed small and fragile, and he wasn't used to seeing her like that.

And then he noticed what she was holding in her hands. ". . . Is that what I think it is?"

She nodded silently and held the object out to him. He took it from her and stared at it for a long time.

He had no idea how to read the thing or what any of the lines meant, but why would she have handed it to him and why would she be standing there with that searching look in her eyes if it wasn't positive?

She was pregnant.

That single acknowledgment sent a tidal wave of thoughts and emotions crashing over him. He felt scared, worried and, at the same time, completely euphoric. He knew _nothing_ about how to raise a child, and he had his own concerns about what kind of father he would be. In the end, however, his euphoria won out over everything else. He knew there was _a lot_ of preparation they would have to do before the baby was born . . . but they had nine months to take care of all that.

She knew everything was going to be fine when she saw the smile spread across his face. She sighed in relief. "I wasn't sure you'd-"

She never got to finish her sentence because he dropped the test from his hands, picked her up by her waist and spun her joyously around in a full three hundred sixty three degree circle before placing her back on her feet and kissing her softly. Then he pulled her to him and wrapped his arms around her.

"Wow," he breathed.

"Yeah," she agreed. His choice of words was a very accurate way of describing everything she was feeling at that moment. "Are you as excited as I am?"

"That and scared out of my mind," he admitted.

She laughed because she didn't want to tell him that she was scared too.

He pulled away from her and looked her up and down as though he expected her to look different from the last time he'd seen her . . . which had only been about ten seconds ago. "How do you feel?" he asked her.

She let out a long breath while she thought that one over. "Not much different," she told him finally.

* * *

That night when they got into bed, he moved as close to her as he possibly could, wrapping an arm around her to lay a hand on her stomach. It was amazing to think that there was a human being growing inside there. As he marveled at this thought, she placed her own hand on top of his.

"When can we start telling people?" he asked.

She smiled. "Whenever we want."

He kissed the top of her head. "Is tomorrow too soon?"


	3. The Birth

Definitely one of the hardest things I've ever written since I've never experienced nor witnessed a birth except from what I've seen on TV (and we all know how accurate that can be). But I wanted to write it, so I gave it a shot and it actually turned out really good. I give myself kudos!

* * *

_The Birth_

Remus and Tonks took a walk around the hospital. They had been told that activity helped to speed up the process and Tonks was anxious for the baby to finally come. With all the false alarms they'd had, it was nice to know that this was finally happening. Getting up at four in the morning hadn't been that welcome of a surprise, but they were both very excited and also a little apprehensive since neither one of them really knew what to expect. They'd been _told_ what would happen, of course, but experiencing it was another thing entirely.

Tonks made a small noise and grabbed his arm. Remus turned, realizing that she had fallen a step behind him.

"Another one?" he asked.

She nodded silently. The pain wasn't overwhelming, but it was intense enough that she didn't want to talk or move. If she had to describe it, she'd say that it felt like really, really bad menstrual cramps.

He moved toward her and she put her arms around his neck, resting her head against his shoulder in a position she was comfortable with. He rubbed her back soothingly while she breathed the way they had practiced at the class they had attended. He wished there were more he could do for her.

"Just be here," she said as though she had read his thoughts.

"I'm not going anywhere," he promised. When the pain passed, he smiled and kissed her lips softly. "I wouldn't miss this for the world."

She could see the excitement in his eyes, and she smiled back at him. He took her hand and they continued their walk.

* * *

Remus stepped out of the room for a moment, but only a moment. He just needed some air. Tonks's contractions were closer together and more intense now. She had been offered several painkillers, but she said she didn't want any. He had to admire her for that, but he wasn't used to seeing her in that kind of pain and it was taking its toll on him. Though, if _he_ was exhausted, then she most certainly was.

"New at this?"

Remus looked up at the voice that had spoken. Another man stood across the hall, apparently doing the same thing he was.

"Is it always this difficult?" Remus asked.

The man shrugged. "With our first one, we were done in about three hours."

Remus didn't know how long he and Tonks had been here. He'd stopped looking at the clock a long time ago, deciding that he'd rather not know how long they'd been waiting. However, he knew it had been more than three hours.

The man indicated the door with a nod of his head. "This is our second - or third - we're having twins," he explained.

"Oh, wow." Remus ran a hand through his hair. He could only imagine what that would be like.

"They're giving us some trouble," he continued, sounding slightly amused. "Do you know what you're having?"

"A girl." Remus told him. "You?"

"We decided to keep it a surprise, but we've got a little boy at home."

Remus nodded thoughtfully. He needed to get back inside. He had felt guilty about leaving and each second he stood outside only added to that. "Well," he said, turning to the door. "In case I don't see you later, congratulations."

"Thanks," said the man. "You too."

Remus resumed his place at Tonks's side, taking her hand in his. "Sorry about that."

She shook her head. "It's fine . . . shouldn't be much longer now . . . At least, I hope not." She closed her eyes as the pain returned.

He smoothed back her damp hair and kissed her forehead. "You're doing great."

* * *

It wasn't long after that when Tonks felt the need to push. Remus was there beside her the whole time, holding her hand and counting out the ten seconds she was supposed to push before taking a breath and going again. She didn't know what she would have done if he hadn't been there for her to hold on to throughout the whole process.

Pushing went pretty quickly for her and it wasn't that bad except when she felt an intense burning sensation and she had bite down on her lip to stop from screaming. Soon after, she was told to stop pushing because the cord was wrapped around the baby's neck and they had to fix that. Remus pressed another kiss to the side of her head while she caught her breath, and he told her once more how great she was doing. Then she was told to give one more push, and they both heard the baby cry.

Tonks hadn't known it was possible to feel so much love so suddenly toward something so small until they placed the baby in her arms and she cried happily, all amount of pain forgotten.

"Look at that," said Remus. She could tell from his voice that he'd felt the same rush of love that she had. "You did that." He kissed her again and she saw the moisture in his eyes.

"We did that," she corrected, smiling and turning back to the bundle she was holding.

Remus reached out and the baby wrapped its fingers around one of his own, his hand looking ridiculously huge compared to the baby's. "She's so tiny," he said, laughing and smiling wondrously.

Tonks turned to him and kissed him. "I love you."

"I love you," he replied. Then he turned to the baby, who still had a grip on his finger. "And we both love you too."

Tonks smiled in agreement. "Happy birthday, Ann."


End file.
